Parenting Resolutions for this Year!

Don’t we all love that God is a God of second chances? Yes, scripture tells us that we are new every morning. In every area of life, we get a second chance. Often, as parents, we feel like we’re in a rut and we can’t get out. But we can. Anything we have started or allowed to continue in our homes, can be undone. It may not be easy, but it can happen and here’s why. You are the adult in the home, and you get to make the changes you see necessary for your family. Please don’t fall into the trap that world is telling families today that the children are in charge because that is not biblical. You are chosen by God to lead your family. You hold the power to make change happen. Here are a few things you can focus on this year that will  make you family stronger and more focused on God’s plan for them. 

1. Resolve to focus on your marriage—this is a hard one because if we know anything about kids, we know they can be demanding—but I just said the key word—CAN—if we allow it. (I’m not taking about times when they are sick, etc.) There was a time in American history when children were not allowed to take precedent over the parents so this can be done successfully. There’s nothing that gives a child more security than seeing his or her parents in a stable, working relationship.
2. Resolve to model the behavior you expect to see in your children. It’s crazy that parents expect their children to act a certain way when they aren’t willing to do it themselves. How we treat others, good manners at the table, holding the door or giving up a seat for someone sick or older—all of these things are important for your child to see. 
3. Resolve to look for obedience, not cooperation: Cooperation is done when a relationship is on equal footing, like a mom and dad. But children are not equal to mom and dad; therefore, obedience is required. Think about your boss at work or the army sergeant. They are looking for an employee or soldier who will obey, not just cooperate. Parents today are operating under a false misconception that children want to be on equal footing with their parents. This is not true. Children still want parents to be parents. This means say what you mean and mean what you say and this is easier than it seems. With just a little practice, you can master this important parenting skill. First of all, tell your kids that you are going to start expecting them to move immediately when you ask them to do something. Tell them you know they are very smart and understand what you say, so you expect them to respond.
4. Resolve to monitor the time your family spends with social media. Not just kids-parents too! We all need a break from the technology so decide about how and when your family would benefit from no technology. Meal times—none after eight o’clock—Saturday morning—Sunday afternoon—never at the dinner table, etc. You choose what works for your family, but set some limits. 
5. Resolve to teach your children how to make healthier food choices. This is a tough one in our busy world of fast foods. Children today are not accustomed to healthy food, but it’s critical to their future health to help them learn the importance of healthy eating. Start by introducing your family to one healthy change a week. This can be fun for the whole family if you put it in a fun way that involves everyone. 
6. Unclutter Something!—nothing drags us down more than a space that is out of control with clutter so resolve to unclutter something. If it’s a larger space, like a game room closet, get your kids to help. It’s a great opportunity for your kids to see how quickly uncluttering can happen. Set the timer and GO—then do a fun reward if you want.
7. Resolve to do something for yourself! Again, as a mom, this is hard. If you have a new baby at home, this will be a time when you commit to being a parent and very little time is left for yourself, but that time passes quickly and, as moms, our identity is wrapped us as being a mom. In fact, in the past 30 years, every magazine article or book told us that’s what moms should do—dedicate all time to our children. BUT, this is not healthy for you or your children. Children need to see YOU doing something that brings you joy—working out, church work, singing, playing tennis, bowling, etc.
8. Resolve to plan better or to stop planning so much. Either one of these things can lead to more stress in your family. If you’re not a planner, this is a crazy concept, but one that can be life changing. If you and your family have mornings that would make a professional air traffic controller, go nuts, then you need to work on planning better so everyone has a better morning. This is one of the easiest ways to take stress out of your family life. Getting everything ready the night before is the key to a happy morning. Or getting up earlier. 

Maybe you’re the opposite and are an over planner. This can cause stress in a family too as no one ever feels like they have time for anything. So, look at your family’s schedule and see what you can let go or put at a different time. 

9. Resolve to get Moving! This doesn’t have to be an organized sport that takes times, it can be just parking farther away from the store or restaurant. Exercise experts continue to say walking is one of the best exercises we can do, but we could go skating with the kids or ride a bike or swim when they swim.

10. Resolve to Get in God’s word. I know, again, it’s a time factor, but putting God in your life through HIS word is key to making everything else work in your life. Think of a new way to approach this challenge like reading everything in red in a red-letter edition Bible, or you and your husband decide to choose a verse a day to read to each other or decide to have a verse a day for your children or study a bible character until you know everything about that character. There are so many ways to study the Bible, you decide.

I hope some of this helps! Which one appeals to you the most. I would love to know.

Hugs, Chrys