Regulating Emotions
With a neighborhood full of littles (seven under five years old), it seems we are in a constant battle with someone falling apart. That’s to be expected when our children are little, right? They are still learning all the mechanics of “keeping it together” when things don’t go our way. They’re still processing what sharing versus boundaries is. They’re still figuring out how you can feel pain, but not cry. It’s all a learning process that parents can really, really help. Studies show that parents who sympathize with the child then help teach them how to cope or deal with it produce adults who function better in life. Notice I say produces adults. I said that because that is the job of every parent—to produce an adult who can be a functioning and productive part of society. Now on to my real concern.
I’m more and more concerned at how our young adults of the world seem to be having the same meltdowns at 18, 24, and, even, early thirties. It worries me when I see jokes about adults, like thirty-year-old adults, saying things like, “I can’t with this adulting thing…” or “I’m so over my kids calling my name all day.”
Okay, you may not be a Survivor fan, but our family loves it. This past season got off to a bad start with one of the contestants asking to be taken off the show. I can’t tell you how that infuriated true survivor fans who know how many people work for years for a spot on the show and then, this girl, has the nerve to get on the show, then declare it is too hard, like she hadn’t watched it for 44 seasons and knew it would be hard, and asked to be removed from the show. Can you tell I was one of the ones infuriated??? Lol
Here’s the deal, if you’re reading this and you’re in that category of being a young adult and having trouble coping with the world you live in, please get help now. Perhaps you need to be taught some coping skills and that is okay. It’s never too late to get better. But here’s the deal, our world is on a slippery slope, and it doesn’t look like it’s getting any better anytime soon, so we all need you. We need every adult to take his or her place in the world and work to make it better. We need you to stand strong for what’s right and not back down when things get hard. We need you to wipe the tears away while you’re looking for a solution for whatever is going on. We need strong families who can tell the world “This is the way to live.” It’s okay to cry, it is, but pick yourself up and get going again.
This too shall pass is one of the best pieces of advice my 92-year-old mom gave me. This too shall pass. Everything you are going through right now will pass. Something else will take its place. That thing might be better, or it might be worse. But you can help the outcome by approaching it like an adult with God on their side. I hope this doesn’t come off harsh, but I want it to come off as instructional and important. If you have littles, love them, but also teach them how to deal with what’s happening to cause them to get emotional. If little Amy loses her ball under the couch and throws a fit because she can’t reach it, tell you get it, that’s hard, but how can she solve the problem. Show her how to do it. When little Johnny falls and scraps his knee, stay calm and address it, but don’t make him feel fragile. And, most importantly, model the kind of behavior you want to see in your kids. Be resilient. Be strong. Be tough. Notice I didn’t say be aloof, not caring, or critical. Nope. Not those things. Approach life like you have a weapon in your back pocket because you do. If God is for you, who can be against you?
Hugs, Chrys
