Our five older grands have reached the age where they no longer fight to get in my lap. In their toddler days we had four under four, and family gatherings featured major skirmishes as they each tried to stake a claim to Keggie. Think Wild West, squatter’s rights, or showdown at the OK Corral, and you’ll get the idea.

I remember having them with me uptown one day when a friend remarked that watching me wrangle them reminded her of one of their family’s favorite memories. It happened years ago when her daughter Lisa was around four or five. As the story goes, Little Lisa’s out of town cousins were in for a family reunion. This was good. Only they were monopolizing Grandmother Merle, whom Lisa usually had all to herself. This was not so good.

Grandmother Merle was in the floor playing with all of the grandkids when little Lisa leaned forward with a stage whisper that could be heard around the room. “Just don’t forget whose grandma you are,” she warned. Am I the only one who hears a little Mafia in that moment? I loved it then and I love it now.

We’ve recently been blessed with a precious new granddaughter named Kennedy Lee. Kenny won’t know that sort of competition. Our grand caboose (at least we think she’s the caboose) will have Keggie’s and Pop’s laps all to herself! While I’m thrilled about these baby years with Kennedy, I’ve also recognized a temptation to dwell on the bittersweet reality that the others have mostly outgrown cuddle time. Can I tell you I’m running from that type of thinking like it’s a plague! I am because it is! In every area of our lives, thinking too much about what was keeps us from enjoying what is.

So, how do we avoid it? (I read your mind, didn’t I?) One way we can make sure we’re not living in yesterday’s memories is by being intentional about mining today’s treasure! For instance, there are countless conversational opportunities with my older grands. I used to have to remind them to use their words instead of pointing to the cookie jar and moaning. But, now? Whew! Now, they have plenty of words for anyone who will listen. And yes, sometimes, it can be an overload when they’re all trying to talk at once, just like it was when they were all trying to get in my lap at once. Are you seeing the theme? I make it my goal to give them my full attention and listen like it’s my last chance to hear.

So, do I successfully maintain this attitude? I think you know better, but I’ll answer that.

No, I don’t. I hope you won’t revoke my Keggie card with this admission, but I’m human, and sometimes the non-stop talking can be taxing. It’s precisely why I say mining today’s treasure must be intentional. Listening positions us to continue speaking into their lives through the years. So, let’s do it.

Let’s offer our ears when they outgrow our laps, and keep leaving a legacy of love that will follow them the rest of their lives. One tale at a time.