If you are in the “grandma” age category, you have probably reached what is commonly called “midlife”. I looked up the definition and discovered the term midlife refers to anyone from ages 40-60. What most sites said is midlife refers to the middle of one’s life. Of course, there is no way of actually knowing when the middle is because one doesn’t know how long they will live.  In any case, we’ll stick with the ages given to us by most sites. 

As I have got older, it became clear that things started to change (physically, I’m talking) about age 40. Now, at my age, 67, I would gladly go back to my young life of 40, but that’s not how life works. As each year passes, we will get older and things that used to work, don’t. This article isn’t meant to be doom and gloom about what lies before you and me, but for us to be realistic and accepting of what is to be.

It would be nice if we could just drink a potion and put everything that has fallen down back into its proper place, but unfortunately it doesn’t work like that. Oh, we try, and I’m all for it–the night creams, the sunscreens, the leg lifts, the vitamins, the yoga class—I’m all in. I’ll do many things in an effort to look and feel my best (going for best, having given up looking younger several years ago). Magazines and social media are all about how we should look and feel at all different ages. Midlife is no different. In fact, it’s encouraging that more and more advertisers are playing to the “midlife” crowd, finally realizing that “midlifers” have more money to spend and more time to spend it on. 

If you want to look at our lives as seasons, you would say our youth is summer, young adult years are spring, midlife is fall, and winter is the rest. I like the analogy. Hang with me. Youth is a time to romp and play, like a good summer day with its longer days and relaxed schedules. Our young adult years are full of planting, watering, budding and growing just as spring is. Our winter years are like putting a sweet blanket of snow on all of our accomplishments and letting them freeze with memories of yesterday. But fall, where many of you are at this time of life, is a time of regrouping from a summer of sweltering heat, like raising our children, advancing in our jobs, and defining ourselves through our homes and families. It’s a time of seeing our life with crisp clarity as we’ve lived enough years to know how to separate wisdom from foolish activities or pride. 

One of the harder things to adjust to during our midlife years is the rapid change of everything. While we seemed to rock along through our raising kids years doing the same thing every day like get the kids out the door, head to work, pick up kids, take kids to practices or ball games or whatever, fix dinner, do homework, say prayers, take showers, clean house, wash clothes, and on and on, every single day for years! Then, one day that is over and something new takes its place and the new isn’t so familiar. It’s different every day. 

Just like the winds of a fall day kick up the fallen leaves and blow them around, so is the nature of midlife. Your hair color changes, your hormones change, your relationship with your spouse changes, not to mention your children, who are now older, and don’t listen quite so closely to your advice or beliefs or views, and your body changes. One day you can get up off the floor with ease and the next you have to look for a chair or table to push from. You might wake up one morning to discover something new on your face—in addition to the laugh lines that aren’t so funny—chin hairs. What?? Where did that come from?? Now, your purchases from CSV contain more maintenance items than enhancing items. UGH! Our skin gets dryer, age spots pop out, hot flashes wake us up at night, varicose veins make our legs look like a game of dot to dot, our feet ache for no reason, fat seems to appear in new places, even our teeth seem to need more attention. 

So, just like we did every stage of our life, it is time to embrace our midlife and be thankful for the wisdoms gained, years accumulated, goals accomplished, friendships forged, and faith strengthened. I talked earlier about our years before midlife being filled with the same thing each day. If you were like me, during those years of endless chores, you dreamed of a day when you didn’t have to be so scheduled. The problem is, the scheduled is what gives us security and meaning and purpose. Midlife is that time when we have the free time we always thought we wanted, but now it feels unfamiliar and leaves us a little insecure as to what our next steps should me. This is all normal. It’s just a time to regroup and set new goals, dream new dreams. 

If you are in this stage of life, be encouraged. You have plenty left to do and plenty of time to do it in. Embrace what God lies before, keep your eyes open for new adventures, enjoy your children as young adults, be grateful for grandbabies who will give you a reason to exercise and eat healthy, and continue to reach for the stars.